Surrendering

For those of you who have been with us from the beginning of this journey, you know that Dave was not at all ready to adopt - until he surrendered and undoubtedly felt God put this deep, deep call in his heart to adopt. Well, the past month or so, we've really been feeling the call to surrender even more. When we started the process, we said "adopt" and "Ethiopia". And, then there's the paperwork and the questions and then you try to figure out what is "just right" for your situation and family and it became more complicated than "adopt" and "Ethiopia". So, we figured the perfect plan for us was one preschooler or early elementary child. So, that's what we requested.....

About a month ago, one of our kids asked us if we should change some of those parameters on our request. We promised that we would consider and pray. We really struggled with all of that pondering and praying. We didn't want to let go of what we thought was best, though we had already had plenty of conversations about changing our parameters.

This past Friday, Dave called and had a good talk with our Social Worker at Adoption Associates (love them!). She too suggested that we could still change our parameters and that in fact she could offer us a referral very quickly if we did. We were CAUGHT! What do we do? If we change the parameters, are we taking things into our own hands, just like Abraham, Sarah and Haggar did? If we stayed the course as we have been, were we missing something God had ready for us? This referral was a different age than what we thought we "should" have - but did we really know what we should have? So our weekend was filled with many conversations, much time in prayer and lots of soul searching. Sunday evening, we spent time with two of the Elders from our church, seeking their prayers and insights.

And, this morning, we officially accepted the referral of a gorgeous little girl - who will turn ONE YEAR old in April!!! We never expected to be accepting the referral of a child so young - but we are so filled with Joy and peace, and already so in love with her!

Yesterday, Vicki shared with Dave that for most of this adoption process, she had been praying that whenever our referral came, that the child would have a Biblical name (our four children all have names from the Bible). Today, as our Social Worker shared the name with Dave, she said, "This is amazing, we rarely can figure out how to pronounce most of the names of our Ethiopian referrals, but this little girl has an English name, and it's one from the Bible even." Friends, God is in the details!

We hope to bring this beautiful young lady to her forever home sometime this summer - please keep praying for all of the rest of the details to fall into place and for she and our current family to be prepared for the adjustments ahead. And, join us in Praising God for His amazing gift in this little life!

Ready to Quit

This morning, I was ready to quit this whole process. Let me explain........last night, we received an email from our Agency Social Worker and the main point of the email was that we are no closer to our referral than we've ever been. We could still be waiting for months. And, there doesn't seem to be any definite reasons or answers as to why. I was so disappointed, so frustrated and so confused. I have believed for so long that God has called us to this adoption - and I have been getting so angry because I feel that we are trying to follow God's call and He doesn't seem to be answering. Why would He call us to this if it seems like it will never happen? Why, when we are trying to be obedient, does there seem to be this wait that no one ever saw coming? Last night, we went to bed weary and worn, pleading to God in our prayers together for some sort of explanation. We awoke this morning and tried to talk a bit about what God might be up to. And, I, well, I was so weary and torn, that I told Dave that I just didn't know if I could continue. The lows of the disappointing times just keep seeming to get lower. And, have I mentioned that I am weary and tired? And, that sometimes I just cry - a lot. I left for work still crying and with puffy eyes from the tears of last night. I know, I know.....you can all tell me that it will be worth it, there is a reason, God has a plan, all "those answers". But, sometimes you can't give any answers that make any sense or bring comfort when it just hurts deeply and the ache in your heart can't be explained.

Then, shortly after I got to work, Dave called. An envelope had been left for us and this is what it said:

"My dearest children, I have spoken and said: "Because of My great love you are not consumed, for My compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is My faithfulness. Remember, I am your portion; therefore wait for Me. I am good to those whose hope is in Me, to the one who seeks Me".

You have sought Me, hoped in Me, waited for Me and remembered Me - I have not forgotten My promise to you. The time is near for My promise to be fulfilled; do not lose heart. You faithfulness has brought Me great joy! My faithfulness will do the same for you. Your children are under My care and will soon be with you; until then, "be steadfast in Me and I will keep you in perfect peace".

"I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you and your children with loving kindness." Absolutely nothing will ever separate you from My love - you are Mine and I am yours. Thank you for waiting on Me.

With all my love and through my servants - Your Heavenly Father"

So, now there were more tears as Dave read me this letter. We have no idea who God used to write it, but we are so very grateful to whoever it was. It was what my heart and soul needed - a reminder to not give up, but to keep on waiting. The words were good medicine to my hurting soul. This was God telling me that I can't Quit - I need to keep putting one foot in front of the other and keep walking this journey - even on the days when it feels like the journey has stopped.

If you are responsible for leaving this very special envelope - Thank you for allowing God to use you - you have no idea what an impact you have made!

To God Be the Glory - always!

Caution ahead.....

Caution ahead......

As Lent begins today, I ask you to read this post slowly and really do some self examination. Most of the words I share today are not my own, but resonate deeply with my heart and soul these days. I borrow them from someone else, who writes much better than I and who definitely lives out her words. (She's adopted 13 children in Uganda)

"Adoption is wonderful and beautiful and the greatest blessing I have ever experienced. Adoption is also difficult and painful. Adoption is a beautiful picture of redemption. It is the Gospel in my living room. And sometimes, it's just hard."

"Adoption is a redemptive response to tragedy that happens in this broken world. And every single day, it is worth it, because adoption is God's heart. His Word says, "In love he predestined us to be adopted as his sons and daughters through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will" (Ephesians 1:5) He sets the lonely in families (Psalm 68:6). The first word that appears when I look up adoption in the dictionary is "acceptance." God accepts me, adores me even, just as I am. And He wants me to accept those without families into my own. Adoption is the reason I can come before God's throne and beg Him for mercy, because He predestined me to be adopted as His child through Jesus Christ."

"My family, adopting these children, it is not optional. It is not my good deed for the day; it is not what I am doing to "help out these poor kids." I adopt because God commands me to care for the orphans and the widows in their distress. I adopt because Jesus says that to whom much has been given, much will be demanded (see Luke 12:48)."

From "Kisses from Katie" by Katie Davis (pgs 72-73)

"The truth is that the 143 million orphaned children and the 11 million who starve to death or die from preventable diseases (emphasis mine) and the 8.5 million who work as child slaves, prostitutes, or under other horrific conditions and the 2.3 million who live with HIV add up to 164.8 million needy children. And though at first glance that looks like a big number, 2.1 billion people on this earth proclaim to be Christians. The truth is that if only 8 percent of the Christians would care for one more child, there would not be any statistics left. This is the Truth. I have the freedom to believe it. The freedom, the opportunity to do something about it. The truth is that He loves these children just as much as He loves me and now that I know, I am responsible"

From "Kisses from Katie" by Katie Davis (pgs 91-92)

So - there you go. You were warned before you read it. Now you too, are responsible. Have you been given much? (If you are an American, yes, you have) Then, much will be expected from you. During this season of Lent - will you commit some prayer, time and conversation with God and see how you need to help the orphans and widows of this world? Maybe you won't feel called to adopt - but could you sponsor a child (http://www.compassion.com/)? Could you help families (encourage, support financially, offer meal help, etc) that feel called to or have adopted? Could you drink only water for this season of Lent (Join Dave & I as we do this http://www.bloodwatermission.com/fortydays.php)

You are responsible - take your responsibility seriously.

Still here.....

Well, we're still here - waiting.

This past Saturday, our local Social Worker came over for our Home Visit. We still have a few pieces of paperwork to wrap up and then she can complete our Home Study (again). Then we will send everything on to the USCIS for re-approval to adopt and another set of Federal Fingerprints to be taken. We hope that we can send in our USCIS request in early March.

We recently had the opportunity to have a family over for dinner who has adopted from Ethiopia. It was a visit that was good for our souls! To see this child in her forever family, adjusted, healthy and happy - it was just beautiful! It was a glimpse of the future that our tired souls really needed to see.

We seem to be no closer right now to our referral - and if we wrote a few weeks ago that we are weary.....well, we are even more weary now and at times we are having a hard time with some anger and other emotions that we are feeling. We are leaning harder than ever into God and His promises - but also spending some time questioning, wondering, pondering and pleading. We continue to always come back to the Call that we feel God has placed in and on our hearts to this adoption. "Caring for orphans is about obedience and expressing the heart of God" (Moments With You by Dennis & Barbara Rainey). We want to be obedient to God and what He wants us to do --- sometimes He just makes waiting a part of that obedience. We would appreciate your prayers that we can stay focused on God and His call to us.

We do have another favor to ask. Would you please go to this link and sign this petition for our family and hundreds of others who have been called to adoption? http://www.change.org/petitions/make-adoption-costs-fully-refundable-in-the-2012-2013-tax-years This year and following, adoptive families will get less and less of a tax credit (soon it will be no tax credit) when they adopt. And - at international adoptions rounding out at about $20,000 (and we are finding that to be a pretty low estimate in our experience so far) tax credits count! Please sign this petition and help send a message that ADOPTION MATTERS and makes a difference in our world.

Please pray for our child(ren) in Ethiopia - that they have food, shelter, care and comfort this day.

Thanks for reading our blog - it is so encouraging to us to know that people take the time to care!