Report Cards

This morning, I printed off the end of year report cards for all the kids.  Two of them (the other two at away at Young Life Camp) looked at them this morning.  I found it interesting that they didn't start looking at their grades right away, but went to the "teacher comments" part.  They knew they did their work, completed their tasks, followed through.  But, what they wanted to know was what the teacher thought.  It made me wish I had a report card right now in regard to Martha.  I'm pretty sure I'd get good marks in "meal provider", "diaper changer", "spending time on floor playing", etc.  But, I'd really like to know her comments.  Who does she see me as?  It's been two weeks since Dave & I picked her up at the orphanage - I am pretty sure I am still the "nice lady who meets her needs". Other then that, I am doubtful that her comments would include "Mommy", "woman who loves me", "person who will protect and defend me", etc.  And that is where even more patience in this process comes into play.....

 As recent emails from both our Michigan and Ohio Social Workers remind us......transition is one thing (and is going well) but bonding and attachment is another thing (and oh goodness, please don't think Attachment Parenting in Time Magazine!! This kind of attachment with an adopted child is TOTALLY different).  We've been reminded to be very "conservative" in our outings and public time with Martha and to be very firm and limiting on the time and amount of guests in our home.  We were also reminded that we need to "be in her face" (for lack of a better term) most of her waking hours - which can be a little exhausting.   These are good reminders, but hard for us too......we're pretty social people and it feels like in a sense we are cutting ourselves off.  But, we know this is for a season and we know this is best for Martha to come to see Dave & I as the parents who have a deep & crazy unconditional love and care for her.  Hopefully, someday that will be the report card comment she will know deep in her heart.