No News, Good News?

Well, another blog update and No News. We had been hoping that sometime in the past couple of weeks, we would hear of some definate changes in the Ethiopian adoption situation - but, No News. I think that for me, this has been the most difficult part of this journey and in a way, I have gone through a time of grieving. We had hoped by now (April), we would at least have our referral and be at a new step in this journey. We still have hope that this will happen eventually, though it is now a hope deferred.

There have been two very precious lessons that I am learning "in the wait" that I'd like to share.
First, God is God. That's it, that's all, that's final. On the days when I really struggle, the words to a song by Steven Curtis Chapman always ring in my ears. Here is a part of that song:

"And the questions without answers
Come and paralyze the dancer
So I stand here on the stage afraid to move
Afraid to fall, oh, but fall I must
On this truth that my life has been formed from the dust
God is God and I am not
I can only see a part of the picture He’s painting
God is God and I am man So I’ll never understand it all
For only God is God And the sky begins to thunder
And I’m filled with awe and wonder
‘Til the only burning question that remains
Is who am I
Can I form a single mountain
Take the stars in hand and count them
Can I even take a breath without God giving it to me
He is first and last before all that has been
Beyond all that will pass
Oh, how great are the riches of His wisdom and knowledge
God is God and I am man
So I’ll never understand it all
For only God is God"

Second, as much as I know that I want to be with, love and care for my child, I am continually reminded how much God wants to be with me, love me and care for me. The ache in my heart is nothing compared to the ache that God has for each one of His children and His desire to have them come home to Him. I know that God fully understands the ache in my heart, and it makes me more aware and grateful for His love and care each day. Please be reminded as you read this that God loves you and desires to love you and care for you in a way that you can't even imagine.

Dave came upon this poem this week (shortened to save blog space) and shared it with me. It offers wisdom that I will need to remember "in the wait".

WAIT by Russel Kelfer

"Wait? you say wait?" my indignant reply.
"Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By faith I have asked, and I'm claiming your Word.
My future and all to which I relate
Hangs in the balance, and you tell me to wait?
I'm needing a 'yes', a go-ahead sign,
Or even a 'no' to which I can resign.
You promised, dear Lord, that if we believe,
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
And Lord I've been asking, and this is my cry:
I'm weary of asking! I need a reply."
Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate,
As my Master replied again, "Wait."
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut,
And grumbled to God, "So, I'm waiting for what?"
"You'd not learn to see through clouds of despair;
You'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there.
You'd not know the joy of resting in Me
When darkness and silence are all you can see.
You'd never experience the fullness of love
When the peace of My spirit descends like a dove.
You would know that I give, and I save, for a start,
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart.
The glow of my comfort late into the night,
The faith that I give when you walk without sight.
The depth that's beyond getting just what you ask
From an infinite God who makes what you have last.
You'd never know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that My grace is sufficient for thee.
Yes, your dearest dreams overnight would come true,
But, oh, the loss, if you missed what I'm doing in you.
So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see
That the greatest of gifts is to truly know me.
And though oft My answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still . . . Wait."

"In the Wait"
Vicki~